Internal Family Systems (IFS)~ Loving & Connecting by Mapping Your Parts
Loving each other in the way each of you needs to feel loved…
Meet & Map Your IFS Parts
A Self-Discovery Guide Using Internal Family Systems (IFS)
At South Tampa Therapy, we often use Internal Family Systems (IFS) as a way to help clients better understand themselves and their relationships. IFS, created by Dr. Richard Schwartz, teaches us that we all have many different parts inside us, inner voices, roles, or patterns of behavior that show up to help us manage life.
These parts aren’t “bad.” In fact, each one is trying to protect you in its own way. The goal of IFS isn’t to get rid of parts, but to listen to them, understand them, and lead them with your calm, compassionate Self.
This page will guide you step-by-step in beginning to meet and map your parts, so you can approach yourself with more compassion and clarity.
The Main IFS Parts
Managers – Work hard to keep you safe, organized, and in control.
Examples: inner critic, perfectionist, caretaker, planner.Firefighters – Step in when you feel triggered, using quick coping strategies to put out emotional fires.
Examples: anger, numbing, bingeing, shutting down.Exiles – Younger, vulnerable parts that carry pain, shame, fear, or sadness from past experiences.
Protectors – An umbrella term for Managers + Firefighters. Their job is to protect you from overwhelm, rejection, or pain.
Vulnerable Child Parts – Carry unmet needs for love, safety, and belonging. They often show up as sadness, loneliness, or fear.
Critic / Judge – Uses criticism or comparison in an attempt to push you to “do better” or keep you safe.
Pleaser / Appeaser – Works to avoid conflict or rejection by keeping others happy.
Rebel / Defiant Part – Pushes back against rules or control to protect your independence.
Self – Your calm, compassionate, confident core. When you’re in Self, you feel centered, curious, and connected.
Guided Exercise: Meet & Map Your Parts
Pause & Breathe
Take a few slow breaths. Place a hand on your heart or another grounding spot. Remind yourself: all parts are welcome here.Imagine an Inner Meeting
Picture all your parts gathering in a safe inner space. Notice who shows up first.Explore Each Part
For each type of part, ask yourself:When do I notice this part show up?
How does it try to help me?
What does it need from me right now?
Simply Notice, Journal or Map It Out
Create awareness, write or sketch what you notice. Some people draw circles or stick figures to represent their parts. Others keep a journal. Do whatever helps you stay curious and compassionate.
Why This Matters
By noticing your parts instead of blending with them, you gain the freedom to respond more intentionally in your life and relationships. For example:
Instead of letting your inner critic run the show, you can notice it and ask what fear it’s trying to protect you from.
Instead of shutting down when angry (Firefighter), you can pause, breathe, and share the deeper feeling underneath, often sadness, fear, or longing.
When you connect with your Self, you lead with calm and compassion, which helps both you and your loved ones feel safer and more connected.
Next Steps
Use this exercise whenever you feel overwhelmed or curious about your inner world.
Share your discoveries in therapy, we’ll integrate them into our work together.
Over time, you’ll learn to relate to your parts with compassion, reduce inner conflict, and feel more connected to your Self.
✨ Remember: there are no bad parts. Each one has a story worth hearing, and healing begins when we listen.
Book an Appointment to start the process. Looking forward to helping out!
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