SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY FREE RESOURCES BLOG
Self-Soothing and Emotion Regulation Worksheet
This is a Self-Soothing and Emotion Regulation Worksheet to help you practice soothing your central nervous system.
This is a Self-Soothing and Emotion Regulation Worksheet to help you practice soothing your central nervous system.
Name: ___________________________ Date: ___________________________
1. Grounding Techniques to Reduce Dissociation
Purpose: To help you reconnect with the present moment and reduce feelings of dissociation.
Instructions: When you start to feel disconnected or spaced out, try the following grounding exercises.
A. Sensory Awareness
5 Things You Can See:
4 Things You Can Touch:
3 Things You Can Hear:
2 Things You Can Smell:
1 Thing You Can Taste:
2. Breathing Exercises to Regulate Emotions
Purpose: To help you manage intense emotions and bring a sense of calm.
Instructions: Practice the following breathing techniques when you feel overwhelmed.
A. Deep Breathing
Find a comfortable position.
Inhale slowly through your nose for a count of 4.
Hold your breath for a count of 4.
Exhale slowly through your mouth for a count of 6.
Repeat 5-10 times or until you feel calmer.
B. Box Breathing
Inhale through your nose for a count of 4.
Hold your breath for a count of 4.
Exhale through your mouth for a count of 4.
Hold your breath for a count of 4.
Repeat 4-6 times or until you feel more regulated.
3. Self-Soothing Techniques to Feel Safe
Purpose: To help you create a sense of safety and comfort.
Instructions: Choose any of the following activities to practice when you need to self-soothe.
A. Physical Comfort
Wrap yourself in a cozy blanket.
Hold a soft stuffed animal or pillow.
Take a warm bath or shower.
B. Soothing Sounds
Listen to calming music or nature sounds.
Hum or sing a favorite song softly.
C. Gentle Movement
Practice gentle stretching or yoga.
Go for a slow, mindful walk.
D. Comforting Smells
Light a scented candle or use essential oils (lavender, chamomile).
Smell a favorite lotion or perfume.
4. Positive Affirmations
Purpose: To help you counter negative thoughts and foster a sense of self-worth.
Instructions: Repeat these affirmations to yourself daily, or whenever you need reassurance.
I am safe and in control.
I am deserving of love and respect.
I am strong and capable.
My feelings are valid.
I am worthy of self-care and kindness.
5. Emergency Contact List
Purpose: To ensure you have support when you need it.
Instructions: Fill in the contact information for people and resources you can reach out to in times of need.
Therapist: ___________________________________ Phone: ______________________
Trusted Friend/Family Member: ___________________________ Phone: ______________
Crisis Hotline: _________________________________ Phone: ______________________
Emergency Services: ____________________________ Phone: ______________________
6. Reflection and Journaling
Purpose: To help you process your emotions and experiences.
Instructions: Use the space below to write about your thoughts, feelings, and any experiences you want to reflect on.
Daily Check-In
Purpose: To monitor your emotional state and practice self-care.
Instructions: Complete this check-in each day.
Date: ___________________________
How do I feel today?
Emotion(s): ________________________
Intensity (1-10): _____________________
What self-soothing technique will I use today?
What positive affirmation will I focus on today?
Remember:
You are taking important steps towards healing and self-care. Be gentle with yourself and use these techniques as tools to support your journey. Reach out for help whenever you need it.
Therapist Contact Information:
Name: _________________________
Phone: _________________________
Email: _________________________
Notes:
By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, DCC, Ph.D
SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY
Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist
❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 🏫 Harvard Trained ❤️🩹 Emotion Focused Therapist 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor👩🏼⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver 🥰 Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 👩❤️👨 Attachment Theorist 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA
"These are the main issues I can help you with, this is what a typical treatment plan may involve, and the benefits you can expect..."
At South Tampa Therapy, we are committed to supporting you every step of the way on your journey towards healing, growth, and transformation. Together, we can create positive change that enriches your relationships and empowers you to live your best life.
At South Tampa Therapy, we specialize in helping individuals and couples connect and strengthen their relationships while creating positive change in their lives. Our approach focuses on three key steps to guide you towards lasting transformation.
Step 1: Attune to Awarenesses
In the first phase of our treatment plan, we will work together to attune to awarenesses of areas in your life and relationships that could be improved. We believe that awareness is the first step towards change, and by identifying areas for growth, you gain the power of choice. Through open and honest exploration, we will uncover underlying patterns, behaviors, and beliefs that may be impacting your relationships and overall well-being.
Step 2: Attach to Agreements
Once we have identified areas for improvement, we will collaborate to create intentional steps and agreements to make positive changes and meet your goals. These agreements serve as a roadmap for your journey towards growth and transformation. By committing to specific actions and behaviors, you will begin to cultivate healthier communication patterns, deepen emotional connection, and foster greater intimacy in your relationships.
Step 3: Accountability for Lasting Change
In the final phase of our treatment plan, we will focus on accountability for lasting change. Together, we will create a maintenance plan to ensure that the progress you've made continues long after our sessions have ended. This may involve regular check-ins, ongoing support, and strategies to navigate challenges as they arise. By taking ownership of your growth and committing to ongoing self-care practices, you will experience sustained positive change in your relationships and personal life.
By following this structured approach, you can expect to experience a range of benefits, including:
Improved Communication: Develop effective communication skills to express your needs, listen actively, and resolve conflicts constructively.
Deepened Emotional Connection: Cultivate greater emotional intimacy and connection with your partner, leading to enhanced trust, understanding, and closeness.
Enhanced Relationship Satisfaction: Experience greater satisfaction and fulfillment in your relationships as you work towards mutual goals and shared values.
Personal Growth and Empowerment: Gain insight into yourself and your relationship dynamics, empowering you to make positive changes and live a more fulfilling life.
Lasting Change: Create lasting change that extends beyond the therapy room, allowing you to maintain healthier relationships and navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience.
At South Tampa Therapy, we are committed to supporting you every step of the way on your journey towards healing, growth, and transformation. Together, we can create positive change that enriches your relationships and empowers you to live your best life.
By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, DCC, Ph.D
SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY
Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist
❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 🏫 Harvard Trained ❤️🩹 Emotion Focused Therapist 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor👩🏼⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver 🥰 Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 👩❤️👨 Attachment Theorist 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA
Breaking Negative Cycles in Relationships: An Attachment-Based Approach
By focusing on our own growth and modeling healthy behaviors, we can inspire change in our partner. As we break free from negative cycles and replace them with positive interactions, we create a ripple effect that can transform the entire relationship.
Remember, change takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you work to break negative cycles and foster a more loving and secure relationship. By prioritizing self-awareness and empathy, you can create a foundation for lasting change and a healthier, more fulfilling partnership.
In relationships, negative cycles can sometimes arise, leading to conflict and dissatisfaction. These cycles can take many forms, such as repetitive arguments, misunderstandings, or unmet emotional needs. Understanding these cycles through the lens of attachment theory can help us navigate them with greater compassion and awareness.
Attachment Styles and Relationship Patterns
Attachment theory explains how our early experiences with caregivers shape our attachment styles, which in turn influence how we form and maintain relationships throughout life. There are three main attachment styles: secure, anxious, and avoidant. These styles can interact in various ways within a relationship, and when paired with stressors or miscommunications, they can contribute to negative cycles.
For example, an anxious partner may seek constant reassurance, while an avoidant partner may withdraw or become distant. This dynamic can lead to a cycle where one partner's need for closeness triggers the other's desire for space, resulting in feelings of rejection and frustration on both sides.
Both Partners' Contributions to Negative Cycles
It's important to recognize that both partners often play a role in perpetuating negative cycles. When one partner's actions provoke a reaction in the other, the response can then trigger another action in the first partner, creating a loop of conflict. This cycle can become self-reinforcing over time, with each partner becoming more entrenched in their respective patterns.
Shifting the Focus to Ourselves
While it can be tempting to focus on changing our partner, the most powerful impact often comes from examining our own role in the cycle. We can't control our partner, but we can control ourselves. By shifting our own actions and participation in the cycle, we can disrupt it and cause positive change.
Here are some steps we can take to shift our focus:
Self-awareness: Reflect on your own attachment style and patterns of behavior in the relationship. Understanding your triggers and responses can help you identify areas for growth.
Communicate openly: Share your feelings and concerns with your partner in a non-judgmental way. Practice active listening and validate their perspective to foster mutual understanding.
Set boundaries: Establish healthy boundaries that respect both your needs and your partner's. This can help prevent negative cycles from escalating.
Practice empathy: Try to see the situation from your partner's point of view. This can help you respond more compassionately and break the cycle of blame and defensiveness.
Model the change: Embody the qualities and behaviors you want to see in your partner. When you demonstrate patience, understanding, and respect, you set an example for your partner to follow.
The Ripple Effect of Change
By focusing on our own growth and modeling healthy behaviors, we can inspire change in our partner. As we break free from negative cycles and replace them with positive interactions, we create a ripple effect that can transform the entire relationship.
Remember, change takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you work to break negative cycles and foster a more loving and secure relationship. By prioritizing self-awareness and empathy, you can create a foundation for lasting change and a healthier, more fulfilling partnership.
Embracing the Full Spectrum: The Power of Increasing Our Window of Tolerance
Embracing difficult emotions can lead to a profound sense of freedom and authenticity. When we no longer fear or suppress our feelings, we become more aligned with our true selves, embracing the fullness of who we are, flaws and all. This authenticity allows us to live more fully and authentically, connecting with others on a deeper level and experiencing life with greater richness and depth. By embracing the full spectrum of our emotional experience, we open ourselves up to a life of greater resilience and freedom. Rather than viewing pain and discomfort as enemies to be avoided, let us embrace them as valuable teachers on the journey toward wholeness and self-discovery. As we learn to tolerate and embrace all that life has to offer, we unlock the door to true healing and transformation.
In the journey of life, we encounter a myriad of emotions, ranging from joy and contentment to sadness and anger. While we often celebrate the positive emotions and strive to cultivate them, the negative ones are frequently met with resistance and avoidance. However, what if I told you that embracing the full spectrum of emotions, including the difficult ones, could lead to greater resilience, freedom, and acceptance?
Our society tends to label negative emotions as something to be avoided or suppressed. We're taught to seek happiness at all costs and to view sadness, anger, or fear as unwelcome intruders in our lives. However, this avoidance can inadvertently lead to a host of harmful behaviors and experiences, as we try to numb or escape from our discomfort rather than confronting it head-on.
The truth is, our bodies are designed to experience a wide range of emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant. Each emotion serves a purpose, offering valuable insights into our inner world and guiding us towards growth and healing. When we suppress or deny our emotions, we disrupt this natural balance, causing tension and disconnection within ourselves.
Increasing our window of tolerance for difficult emotions involves cultivating the capacity to hold and navigate these feelings with compassion and curiosity, rather than judgment or avoidance. It's about acknowledging that pain and discomfort are inevitable parts of the human experience and learning to embrace them as integral aspects of our journey.
But what does it mean to embrace difficult emotions? It's important to understand that acceptance doesn't necessarily mean agreement or approval. Rather, it's about acknowledging the reality of our experiences without trying to change or control them. When we allow ourselves to sit with our discomfort, we create space for healing and transformation to unfold.
Embracing difficult emotions also requires us to cultivate a sense of self-compassion and resilience. Instead of berating ourselves for feeling sad or anxious, we can offer ourselves kindness and understanding, recognizing that our emotions are valid and deserving of acknowledgment. Through this process, we develop greater resilience in the face of adversity, learning to weather life's storms with grace and resilience.
Moreover, embracing difficult emotions can lead to a profound sense of freedom and authenticity. When we no longer fear or suppress our feelings, we become more aligned with our true selves, embracing the fullness of who we are, flaws and all. This authenticity allows us to live more fully and authentically, connecting with others on a deeper level and experiencing life with greater richness and depth. By embracing the full spectrum of our emotional experience, we open ourselves up to a life of greater resilience and freedom. Rather than viewing pain and discomfort as enemies to be avoided, let us embrace them as valuable teachers on the journey toward wholeness and self-discovery. As we learn to tolerate and embrace all that life has to offer, we unlock the door to true healing and transformation.
By Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I
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How to Learn to Tolerate and Hold Space for Your Partner’s Distress
Helping clients learn to tolerate their partner's distress can be a crucial aspect of couples therapy. It promotes empathy, understanding, and ultimately strengthens the relationship. Here are some strategies you can employ:
Helping clients learn to tolerate their partner's distress can be a crucial aspect of couples therapy. It promotes empathy, understanding, and ultimately strengthens the relationship. Here are some strategies you can employ:
Normalize Feelings: Begin by normalizing emotions. Explain that it's natural for partners to experience distress or strong emotions from time to time, and it doesn't necessarily indicate a problem in the relationship.
Educate About Triggers: Help clients identify common triggers for their partner's distress. Understanding what sets off their emotions can lead to greater empathy and better communication.
Practice Active Listening: Encourage active listening skills. This means giving full attention, avoiding interruptions, and validating the partner's feelings without immediately trying to solve the issue.
Empathy Building Exercises: Engage in empathy-building exercises. This could involve role-playing where each partner takes on the other's perspective to better understand their emotions.
Validate Emotions: Teach clients the importance of validating their partner's emotions, even if they don't understand them or agree with them. Simply acknowledging their feelings can go a long way.
Encourage Open Communication: Create a safe space for open and honest communication. Help clients express their feelings, concerns, and needs without fear of judgment or criticism.
Use "I" Statements: Teach clients to use "I" statements to express themselves. This encourages personal responsibility for feelings and avoids blaming the partner.
Avoid Defensiveness: Help clients recognize defensive behaviors and work towards replacing them with more constructive responses. Defensiveness can escalate conflict and hinder empathy.
Practice Mindfulness: Encourage mindfulness practices to help clients stay present and non-reactive in the face of their partner's distress. This can prevent knee-jerk reactions and allow for more thoughtful responses.
Set Boundaries: Help clients establish healthy boundaries to protect their own emotional well-being while still being present and supportive for their partner.
Highlight Strengths: Remind clients of their own and their partner's strengths. This can instill confidence in their ability to navigate difficult emotions together.
Explore Attachment Styles: Understanding attachment styles can shed light on why partners react to distress in certain ways. This insight can foster compassion and empathy.
Practice Patience: Encourage clients to practice patience with themselves and their partner. Tolerating distress is a skill that takes time and effort to develop.
Seek Professional Guidance: If the distress is chronic or particularly challenging, suggest seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in couples therapy.
Remember to be patient and supportive throughout the process. Developing the ability to tolerate a partner's distress is a journey that requires time, effort, and practice.