"These are the main issues I can help you with, this is what a typical treatment plan may involve, and the benefits you can expect..."

At South Tampa Therapy, we specialize in helping individuals and couples connect and strengthen their relationships while creating positive change in their lives. Our approach focuses on three key steps to guide you towards lasting transformation.

Step 1: Attune to Awarenesses

In the first phase of our treatment plan, we will work together to attune to awarenesses of areas in your life and relationships that could be improved. We believe that awareness is the first step towards change, and by identifying areas for growth, you gain the power of choice. Through open and honest exploration, we will uncover underlying patterns, behaviors, and beliefs that may be impacting your relationships and overall well-being.

Step 2: Attach to Agreements

Once we have identified areas for improvement, we will collaborate to create intentional steps and agreements to make positive changes and meet your goals. These agreements serve as a roadmap for your journey towards growth and transformation. By committing to specific actions and behaviors, you will begin to cultivate healthier communication patterns, deepen emotional connection, and foster greater intimacy in your relationships.

Step 3: Accountability for Lasting Change

In the final phase of our treatment plan, we will focus on accountability for lasting change. Together, we will create a maintenance plan to ensure that the progress you've made continues long after our sessions have ended. This may involve regular check-ins, ongoing support, and strategies to navigate challenges as they arise. By taking ownership of your growth and committing to ongoing self-care practices, you will experience sustained positive change in your relationships and personal life.

By following this structured approach, you can expect to experience a range of benefits, including:

1. Improved Communication: Develop effective communication skills to express your needs, listen actively, and resolve conflicts constructively.

2. Deepened Emotional Connection: Cultivate greater emotional intimacy and connection with your partner, leading to enhanced trust, understanding, and closeness.

3. Enhanced Relationship Satisfaction: Experience greater satisfaction and fulfillment in your relationships as you work towards mutual goals and shared values.

4. Personal Growth and Empowerment: Gain insight into yourself and your relationship dynamics, empowering you to make positive changes and live a more fulfilling life.

5. Lasting Change: Create lasting change that extends beyond the therapy room, allowing you to maintain healthier relationships and navigate life's challenges with confidence and resilience.

At South Tampa Therapy, we are committed to supporting you every step of the way on your journey towards healing, growth, and transformation. Together, we can create positive change that enriches your relationships and empowers you to live your best life.

By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, DCC, Ph.D

SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY

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Call or Text (813)240-3237

Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist

❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 🏫 Harvard Trained ❤️‍🩹 Emotion Focused Therapist 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor👩🏼‍⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver 🥰 Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼‍♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 👩‍❤️‍👨 Attachment Theorist 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming Practitioner ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑‍🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩‍🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA

www.SouthTampaCounselor.com

SouthTampaTherapy@gmail.com

Advice on Saving a Relationship on the Brink

In the intricate dance of relationships, even the strongest partnerships can sometimes find themselves on shaky ground. Whether it’s due to ongoing disagreements, growing apart, or external stresses, reaching the brink of a breakup can feel like standing at a precipice. Yet, it’s often at these critical junctures that the potential for profound growth and renewal exists. In this guide, we’ll explore practical advice and strategies for saving a relationship that seems dangerously close to ending. From improving communication to rekindling romance, and addressing underlying issues, these insights aim to empower couples to navigate their challenges and rediscover their bond. Whether you’re looking to heal old wounds or set a new course together, the journey to mend a faltering relationship starts with understanding, empathy, and a willingness to work collaboratively towards common goals.

1. Open and Honest Communication

- Importance of Communication: Clear and honest communication is crucial in understanding each other's feelings and perspectives. Avoiding assumptions and expressing feelings directly can prevent misunderstandings.

- Active Listening: Practice active listening by paying full attention to your partner, reflecting back what you hear, and showing empathy. This helps in validating each other's feelings and builds trust.

- Nonviolent Communication (NVC): Use NVC principles to express needs and feelings without blame or criticism. This involves stating observations, expressing feelings, identifying needs, and making requests.

2. Rebuilding Trust

- Acknowledge and Apologize: If trust has been broken, acknowledge the hurt caused and offer a sincere apology. This step is vital in starting the healing process.

- Consistent Actions: Rebuilding trust requires consistent actions over time. Follow through on promises and be reliable to show that you are committed to change.

3. Emotional Connection

- Quality Time Together: Spend quality time together to reconnect emotionally. Engage in activities that you both enjoy and create positive experiences.

- Emotional Intimacy: Share your inner thoughts and feelings with each other. Emotional intimacy can be deepened through meaningful conversations and mutual support.

4. Conflict Resolution

- Fair Fighting: Resolve conflicts using fair fighting techniques. Avoid personal attacks, stay focused on the issue at hand, and seek to understand each other's perspectives.

- Gottman’s Principles: Use Gottman’s principles for managing conflict, such as soft start-ups (beginning conversations gently), repairing attempts (efforts to de-escalate tension), and compromise.

5. Seek Professional Help

- Couples Therapy: Consider seeking help from a professional therapist who specializes in couples therapy. A therapist can provide tools and techniques to navigate difficult conversations and rebuild your relationship.

- Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT): EFT can help couples understand and change negative patterns in their relationship by focusing on emotions and attachment needs.

6. Self-Reflection and Personal Growth

- Individual Work: Reflect on your own behavior and contribution to the relationship's issues. Personal growth can significantly impact the dynamics of the relationship.

- Healthy Boundaries: Establish healthy boundaries that respect both partners' needs and individuality. This helps in creating a balanced and respectful relationship.

7. Commitment and Patience

- Commitment to Change: Both partners must be committed to working on the relationship and making necessary changes. This involves patience and perseverance.

- Small Steps: Focus on making small, consistent improvements rather than expecting immediate, dramatic changes. Celebrate progress and stay hopeful.

Additional Resources

- "The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work" by John Gottman and Nan Silver

- "Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love" by Sue Johnson

- "Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life" by Marshall B. Rosenberg

By applying these strategies and being committed to improving your relationship, you can navigate through difficult times and rebuild a stronger, more resilient partnership.

By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, DCC, Ph.D

SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY

Book Appointment

Call or Text (813)240-3237

Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist

❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor 👩🏼‍⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver ❤️ Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼‍♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑‍🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩‍🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA

www.SouthTampaCounselor.com

SouthTampaTherapy@gmail.com

Embracing Self-Compassion: The Path to Genuine Accountability

In the hustle and bustle of daily life, it's all too easy to become our own worst critics. We often believe that being hard on ourselves is the key to motivation and success. However, this self-critical approach can backfire, leading to feelings of demotivation, procrastination, and even harmful forms of perfectionism. Contrary to popular belief, self-compassion is a powerful tool that fosters genuine accountability and helps us align our actions with our values and goals.

The Demotivating Nature of Self-Criticism

Self-criticism often masquerades as a motivator, but it usually has the opposite effect. When we berate ourselves for our perceived shortcomings, it creates a negative feedback loop that can be incredibly demoralizing. This harsh inner dialogue can lead to:

• Perfectionism: Setting impossibly high standards and feeling paralyzed by the fear of not meeting them.

• Procrastination: Avoiding tasks because we are afraid of failing or not doing them perfectly.

• Low Self-Esteem: Constantly feeling inadequate and unworthy, which can sap our motivation and energy.

In essence, being overly critical can cause us to fall even further from our values and ideals, perpetuating a cycle of self-doubt and inaction.

The Empowering Force of Self-Compassion

Self-compassion, on the other hand, is about treating ourselves with the same kindness and understanding that we would offer to a friend. It involves three core components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness.

1. Self-Kindness: Instead of harshly judging ourselves for our mistakes and failures, we offer ourselves warmth and understanding.

2. Common Humanity: Recognizing that suffering and imperfection are part of the shared human experience, reducing feelings of isolation.

3. Mindfulness: Observing our thoughts and feelings without over-identifying with them, maintaining a balanced perspective.

By integrating these elements into our lives, we can foster a healthier, more supportive inner environment.

How Self-Compassion Enhances Accountability

Self-compassion doesn’t mean letting ourselves off the hook or ignoring our responsibilities. Rather, it encourages us to be honest and accountable in a loving and supportive manner. Here’s how:

1. Reduces Fear of Failure: When we know we will treat ourselves kindly, even if we fail, we are more likely to take risks and pursue our goals without the paralyzing fear of making mistakes.

2. Promotes Self-Awareness: Self-compassion allows us to acknowledge our flaws and mistakes without self-condemnation, leading to greater self-awareness and personal growth.

3. Sustains Motivation: Kindness and understanding boost our intrinsic motivation. We are driven not by fear, but by a genuine desire to improve and succeed.

4. Encourages Persistence: With self-compassion, we are more likely to persevere in the face of setbacks because we see them as opportunities for learning rather than as definitive failures.

Practicing Self-Compassion for Future Success

Self-compassion is, in essence, an act of self-love that extends to our future selves. When we practice self-compassion, we are investing in our long-term well-being and success. Here are some ways to incorporate self-compassion into your daily routine:

• Practice Self-Compassionate Dialogue: Replace negative self-talk with supportive and encouraging words. For example, instead of saying, "I can’t believe I messed up again," try, "It's okay to make mistakes. I can learn from this and do better next time."

• Set Realistic Goals: Break down larger goals into manageable steps and celebrate your progress along the way. Acknowledge that setbacks are part of the journey and use them as learning experiences.

• Mindful Self-Reflection: Regularly check in with yourself. Reflect on your actions and decisions with curiosity rather than judgment. Ask yourself how you can support your growth and well-being.

• Self-Care Practices: Engage in activities that nurture your body, mind, and spirit. This could be anything from physical exercise to meditation to spending time with loved ones.

By fostering self-compassion, we hold our future selves in mind, creating a foundation of kindness and accountability. This compassionate approach not only helps us stay motivated but also ensures that we remain aligned with our values and aspirations, leading to a more fulfilling and successful life.

In the end, self-compassion is not about making excuses for ourselves; it’s about creating a supportive inner environment where we can thrive. By treating ourselves with kindness and understanding, we cultivate the strength and resilience needed to achieve our goals and live in accordance with our highest values. So, let’s embrace self-compassion and unlock the true potential of accountability.

By Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I 

Book a session with me using the link below:

https://southtampatherapybookappt.as.me/ChelseaR

The Urgent Need to Support Trans Youth: How We Can Make a Difference

By: Ari Leal, CMHCI

​In today’s society, transgender youth face extraordinary challenges and hostilities, often from multiple fronts. It's heartbreaking to recognize the stark reality: 89% of transgender students endure verbal harassment, 55% suffer physical harassment, and 28% experience physical assault at school. These adverse conditions lead to lower academic performance, higher absenteeism, and a diminished likelihood of pursuing higher education. Feeling unsafe and unsupported contributes significantly to the alarming rates of depression and suicidal ideation among trans youth.

​Family rejection compounds these difficulties. Over half of transgender youth lack family support, which exacerbates their struggles. Alarmingly, 53% of transgender and nonbinary youth have seriously considered suicide in the past year, and 20% have attempted to take their lives. This underscores the critical need for supportive environments and interventions.

​Additionally, legislative measures in states like Florida further restrict the rights and well-being of trans youth. Healthcare restrictions limit access to gender-affirming treatments, while educational policies silence discussions on gender identity. These laws foster exclusion and discrimination, increasing ostracization, bullying, and mental health issues. Trans youth are often prohibited from participating in sports teams that align with their gender identity and face challenges accessing appropriate bathroom facilities.

​Support groups emerge as crucial lifelines, providing safe and affirming spaces for trans youth. These groups offer understanding, affirmation, and peer support, often lacking in other areas of their lives. Research shows that support groups reduce feelings of isolation, boost self-esteem, and enhance overall mental health, creating a sense of community and belonging essential for positive outcomes.

​As individuals and independent practices, we can play a pivotal role in supporting trans youth and compensating for the lack of governmental and societal support. Vital steps include creating affirming environments, ensuring specialized training for therapists, involving families, connecting trans youth with support networks, maintaining confidentiality, collaborating with schools, and engaging in public education and advocacy.

​The discrimination and lack of support for transgender youth in schools and society are deeply concerning. At South Tampa Therapy, we are committed to creating inclusive and supportive environments that significantly improve the lives of trans youth. We can help mitigate the risks of hostile environments, family rejection, and societal discrimination by fostering resilience, self-esteem, and overall well-being through peer support and reducing isolation. Together, we can ensure that trans youth have the opportunity to thrive and pursue happiness.

For more information or to schedule a consultation, please get in touch with South Tampa Therapy. Together, we can make a difference.

Book with this author ~Ari Leal, Therapist, CMHCI: https://SouthTampaTherapyBOOKAPPT.as.me/AriLeal 

References

Greytak, E. A., Diaz, E. M., & Kosciw, J. G. (2009). Harsh realities: The experiences of transgender youth in our nation’s schools. New York: GLSEN.

National Center for Transgender Equality. (2023). Youth and students. Retrieved from NCTE

GLSEN. (2023). Improving school climate for transgender and nonbinary youth. New York: GLSEN.

Gainor, K. A. (1999). Including transgender issues in lesbian, gay, and bisexual psychology: Implications for clinical practice and training. In B. Greene & G. Herek (Eds.), Lesbian and gay psychology: Theory, research, and clinical applications (pp. 131–160). Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage.

The Trevor Project. (2023). National Survey on LGBTQ Youth Mental Health. Retrieved from The Trevor Project.

Lev, A. I. (2004). Transgender emergence: Therapeutic guidelines for working with gender-variant people and their families. Haworth Press.

Grossman, A. H., & D'Augelli, A. R. (2006). Transgender youth: Invisible and vulnerable. Journal of Homosexuality, 51(1), 111-128. https://doi.org/10.1300/J082v51n01_06

Lev, A. I. (2004). Transgender emergence: Therapeutic guidelines for working with gender-variant people and their families. Haworth Press.

National Center for Transgender Equality. (2023). Youth and students. Retrieved from NCTE.

Book with this author ~Ari Leal, Therapist, CMHCI: https://SouthTampaTherapyBOOKAPPT.as.me/AriLeal

Exploring the Transformative Impact of Intensive Psychotherapy

Studies exploring the transformative impact of Intensive Psychotherapy reveal its potential to induce profound and enduring changes in individuals' lives. Here are noteworthy findings from recent research:

1. Rapid Symptom Alleviation: Intensive Psychotherapy demonstrates notable efficacy in alleviating symptoms across various mental health disorders, encompassing depression, anxiety, trauma-related conditions, and personality disorders (Abbass et al., 2018).

2. Profound Emotional Exploration: Within a condensed timeframe, Intensive Psychotherapy fosters deep emotional processing, enabling individuals to confront and resolve underlying issues, unprocessed traumas, and maladaptive cognitive-behavioral patterns (Town et al., 2019).

3. Heightened Insight and Self-Understanding: Clients engaging in Intensive Psychotherapy frequently report heightened levels of self-awareness and profound insights into their cognitive, emotional, and behavioral dynamics, fostering greater self-understanding and personal growth (Jones et al., 2020).

4. Enhanced Coping Capacities: Intensive Psychotherapy equips individuals with tangible coping mechanisms and adaptive strategies to effectively manage stress, regulate emotions, and navigate life's challenges with greater resilience and efficacy (Berking et al., 2014).

5. Transformational Evolution: Findings suggest that Intensive Psychotherapy holds the potential to catalyze transformative growth and positive changes across various domains of individuals' lives, encompassing interpersonal relationships, occupational functioning, and overall well-being (Hofmann et al., 2020).

6. Sustainable Benefits: Intensive Psychotherapy has been associated with sustained improvements in mental health outcomes, with clients reporting enduring benefits long after the conclusion of the intensive treatment phase, underscoring the lasting impact of therapeutic intervention.

These insights collectively highlight the profound and enduring transformative potential of Intensive Psychotherapy in fostering holistic well-being and personal evolution with the potential to promote healing, growth, and positive change in individuals struggling with various mental health concerns in a shorter period of time with lasting effects.

References:

• Abbass, A., Kisely, S., Rasic, D., & Katzman, J. (2018). Short-Term Psychodynamic Psychotherapy for Somatic Disorders: Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis of Clinical Trials. Psychotherapy and Psychosomatics, 87(4), 1–14.

• Town, J. M., Diemer, E. W., Litz, B. T., Gallagher, M. W., Baker, A. S., & Resick, P. A. (2019). Intensive Cognitive Processing Therapy for Combat-Related PTSD: A Randomized Controlled Trial with 2-Year Follow-Up. Journal of Anxiety Disorders, 66, 1–9.

• Jones, H. E., Macleod, A. D., Plush, T., & Fonagy, P. (2020). Clients’ Experiences of Intensive Short-Term Dynamic Psychotherapy: A Qualitative Study. Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy, 34(3), 242–260.

• Berking, M., Wittekind, C. E., Rörtgen, T., Reichardt, A., & Hiller, W. (2014). Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder: A Meta-Analysis Using Mixed-Effects Modeling. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 82(6), 1013–1026.

• Hofmann, S. G., Asnaani, A., Vonk, I. J., Sawyer, A. T., & Fang, A. (2020). The Efficacy of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy: A Review of Meta-analyses. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 36(5), 427–440.

Learn more here: https://southtampacounselor.com/intensive-therapy

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Imagine being able to do months of therapy in a few intensive sessions!

Intensive Therapy might be great for you if :

• You want to jump-start your healing

• You've been doing therapy for a while and feel stuck

• You aren't able to commit an hour each week for the next years

• You don't like feeling rushed each week

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Call or Text Dr. Mahaney directly #813-240-3237 if you would like a more comprehensive in-depth quote for services.

Breaking Negative Cycles in Relationships: An Attachment-Based Approach

In relationships, negative cycles can sometimes arise, leading to conflict and dissatisfaction. These cycles can take many forms, such as repetitive arguments, misunderstandings, or unmet emotional needs. Understanding these cycles through the lens of attachment theory can help us navigate them with greater compassion and awareness.

Attachment Styles and Relationship Patterns

Attachment theory explains how our early experiences with caregivers shape our attachment styles, which in turn influence how we form and maintain relationships throughout life. There are three main attachment styles: secure, anxious, and avoidant. These styles can interact in various ways within a relationship, and when paired with stressors or miscommunications, they can contribute to negative cycles.

For example, an anxious partner may seek constant reassurance, while an avoidant partner may withdraw or become distant. This dynamic can lead to a cycle where one partner's need for closeness triggers the other's desire for space, resulting in feelings of rejection and frustration on both sides.

Both Partners' Contributions to Negative Cycles

It's important to recognize that both partners often play a role in perpetuating negative cycles. When one partner's actions provoke a reaction in the other, the response can then trigger another action in the first partner, creating a loop of conflict. This cycle can become self-reinforcing over time, with each partner becoming more entrenched in their respective patterns.

Shifting the Focus to Ourselves

While it can be tempting to focus on changing our partner, the most powerful impact often comes from examining our own role in the cycle. We can't control our partner, but we can control ourselves. By shifting our own actions and participation in the cycle, we can disrupt it and cause positive change.

Here are some steps we can take to shift our focus:

1. Self-awareness: Reflect on your own attachment style and patterns of behavior in the relationship. Understanding your triggers and responses can help you identify areas for growth.

2. Communicate openly: Share your feelings and concerns with your partner in a non-judgmental way. Practice active listening and validate their perspective to foster mutual understanding.

3. Set boundaries: Establish healthy boundaries that respect both your needs and your partner's. This can help prevent negative cycles from escalating.

4. Practice empathy: Try to see the situation from your partner's point of view. This can help you respond more compassionately and break the cycle of blame and defensiveness.

5. Model the change: Embody the qualities and behaviors you want to see in your partner. When you demonstrate patience, understanding, and respect, you set an example for your partner to follow.

The Ripple Effect of Change

By focusing on our own growth and modeling healthy behaviors, we can inspire change in our partner. As we break free from negative cycles and replace them with positive interactions, we create a ripple effect that can transform the entire relationship.

Remember, change takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself and your partner as you work to break negative cycles and foster a more loving and secure relationship. By prioritizing self-awareness and empathy, you can create a foundation for lasting change and a healthier, more fulfilling partnership.

The Illusion of Control in Relationships: A Path to Autonomy and Acceptance

Control in relationships can give us a false sense of security, leading us to believe that by exerting influence over our partner, we can manage our needs and desires. However, this approach often has the opposite effect, pushing our partner further away and potentially causing resentment or dissatisfaction in the relationship. Let's explore why control is detrimental and how we can shift towards autonomy and acceptance instead.

The False Security of Control

The urge to control often stems from a desire to manage our emotions and meet our needs. We may think that by guiding our partner's actions or responses, we can create a sense of stability and predictability. This belief can be rooted in underlying fears of uncertainty or anxiety about unmet needs.

However, control is a double-edged sword. While it may provide short-term relief or gratification, it can ultimately harm the relationship. Over time, it can erode trust, diminish intimacy, and create distance between partners.

The Importance of Autonomy

Autonomy is a fundamental aspect of healthy relationships. It allows each partner to maintain their individuality, make independent choices, and feel respected in their decisions. When one partner attempts to control the other, it infringes on their autonomy and can lead to feelings of suffocation or resentment.

Tolerating Discomfort and Embracing Acceptance

To move away from controlling behaviors, it's essential to learn to tolerate discomfort and difficult emotions. This process involves reaching a point of acceptance for things beyond our control, such as our partner's thoughts, feelings, and choices.

Here are some strategies to cultivate acceptance and autonomy in relationships:

1. Self-Regulation: Learn to manage your emotions and responses to challenging situations. Practice mindfulness and breathing exercises to stay calm and centered.

2. Awareness: Reflect on your feelings and needs in the moment. Ask yourself what you're trying to achieve through controlling behavior and whether there are healthier ways to meet your needs.

3. Identify Payoffs: Recognize the short-term gains you receive from controlling behaviors. While these payoffs may provide immediate comfort, they can reinforce unhealthy patterns in the long run.

4. Communicate Needs: Openly express your needs to your partner without attempting to control their response. This fosters mutual understanding and collaboration.

5. Practice Empathy: Try to understand your partner's perspective and respect their autonomy. This can help you approach situations with more compassion and less control.

6. Embrace Acceptance: Acknowledge the things you can't control and focus on what you can influence, such as your own behavior and responses.

Finding Long-Term Fulfillment

While controlling behaviors may offer temporary relief, they can undermine the long-term health of the relationship. By shifting away from control and towards acceptance, we can foster a stronger, more resilient partnership.

Embrace the journey of self-awareness and growth. As you learn to manage your own emotions and reactions, you can cultivate a more harmonious and fulfilling relationship that values autonomy, mutual respect, and open communication.

Book a session with Author Chelsea Reeves, MFTI here: https://southtampacounselor.com/bookappointment

Gottman Approach and Emotionally Focused Therapy Model Perspective on Wedding Planning with Parents

As Featured in BRIDES Magazine:

Why do brides and grooms often enlist their parents’ help while planning their wedding?

Brides and grooms often seek their parents' help in wedding planning because weddings are significant life events that involve family traditions, values, and expectations. Parents have a wealth of experience and often play a crucial role in family dynamics, making their input valuable and sought after by the couple. Additionally, weddings often bring families together, creating opportunities for connection, collaboration, and shared joy.

What is their typical level of involvement in the planning process?

The level of involvement can vary widely among families and couples. Typically, parents may be involved in major decisions such as venue selection, budgeting, and guest list management. Some parents may take a more active role, while others prefer to be consulted for input when needed. This variability of wedding planning involvement may or may not be correlated with financial aspects of the wedding and who or the amount of money that the parents may be contributing. Their involvement often reflects their desire to contribute meaningfully to the celebration and support their children's choices.

What tasks do the parents typically help their kids with? How do they differ on the bride and groom's side?

Parents often assist with tasks like venue selection, financial planning, and coordinating with vendors. On the bride's side, tasks may include dress shopping, floral arrangements, and décor choices. On the groom's side, tasks might involve selecting attire, transportation, and music or entertainment. However, these roles are becoming more flexible and can vary based on the interests and preferences of the individuals involved.

How should the two sets of parents approach the conversation of helping their kids plan their wedding?

Open communication and collaboration can be the key. Using compassionate  communication principles, AKA Nonviolent Communication (NVC) they can focus on expressing feelings, needs, and requests respectfully.Both sets of parents should approach the conversation with empathy, understanding, and respect for each other's perspectives. It's essential to listen actively, express opinions constructively, and be flexible in compromising to accommodate everyone's wishes.

Is it common for both sets of parents to clash during the wedding planning process? Why? What are some challenges that might arise?

Yes, it is common for both sets of parents to clash during wedding planning due to stress, differing opinions, expectations, and values. Some challenges that might arise include disagreements over finances or budgeting, guest list and who to invite, cultural/ religious or family traditions, and the overall vision for how the wedding “should” go.

How can parents deal when their child’s future in-laws are difficult to interact with during the wedding planning process?

The best way to deal with difficult people in general is to try to use empathy and understanding as much as possible. Most of the time all big reactions or “attacks” are unskilled ways of trying to get a need met. Reactions sabotage connection. Intentional calm responses can help repair the disconnect that may be occurring. Dealing with difficult future in-laws requires patience, understanding, and effective communication. Setting boundaries, maintaining open lines of communication, and focusing on common goals can help navigate challenging interactions. It's also essential to prioritize the couple's wishes and needs while respectfully considering the opinions of all parties involved. Boundary setting and compromise based on needs can be very useful tools to deal with these issues more amicably.

Three to Five Tips to Help Parents Navigate Wedding Planning Together:

1. Open Communication: Encourage open and honest communication among all parties involved. Create a safe space where everyone feels heard, valued, and respected. Discuss expectations, preferences, and concerns openly to avoid misunderstandings. Listen to your parents' perspectives and concerns with an open mind, without interrupting or becoming defensive. Show empathy and understanding towards their feelings and needs.

2. Set Clear Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries to respect everyone's roles and responsibilities. Clearly define who is responsible for what tasks and decisions to avoid conflicts and overlapping efforts. Assign specific tasks or responsibilities to your parents that align with their interests and strengths. This can make them feel valued and involved in the planning process. Collaborate on planning aspects of the wedding that are important to your parents, while maintaining autonomy over decisions that are important to you.

3. Flexibility and Compromise: Be flexible and willing to compromise to accommodate everyone's wishes and preferences. Focus on finding common ground and solutions that satisfy everyone involved. Remember, it's a celebration of love and unity, so prioritize harmony and collaboration. Identify and focus on shared goals and values that are important to both you and your parents. This can help align your priorities and reduce conflicts.

4. Seek Professional Help if Needed: Consider seeking professional help from a wedding planner or counselor if tensions rise or conflicts become unmanageable. A neutral third party can offer valuable insights, mediate disputes, and help keep the planning process on track.

5. Celebrate Together: Remember to celebrate the joyous occasion and focus on the love and unity that the wedding represents. Keep a positive attitude, cherish the special moments, and appreciate the opportunity to come together as a family to celebrate this significant milestone.

By following these tips and approaches, parents can navigate the wedding planning process together more seamlessly, fostering understanding, harmony, and collaboration throughout. Prioritizing self-care and stress management to maintain your well-being during the wedding planning process can be super beneficial. Take breaks when needed, engage in activities you enjoy, and seek support from loved ones.

By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, DCC, Ph.D

SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY

Book Appointment

Call or Text (813)240-3237

Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist

❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor 👩🏼‍⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver ❤️ Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼‍♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑‍🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩‍🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA

www.SouthTampaCounselor.com

SouthTampaTherapy@gmail.com

Unpack Your Love Baggage with Imago: A Journey from Conflict to Connection

            As therapists, we often find that a communication breakdown is one of the first hurdles couples face in a crisis. In these moments, partners commonly feel disrespected, unseen, or unheard, creating a chasm that seems too broad to bridge. As therapists, we immediately focus on nurturing practical communication skills to address this gap. What’s remarkable is how couples report the benefits of these new skills often extend beyond the therapy room and the romantic relationship—enhancing interactions at work, in social settings, and even with other loved family members.

            In my journey to better serve couples struggling with intimacy and communication issues, I've explored various therapeutic approaches. Imago Relationship Therapy (IRT) is one method that resonates deeply with me and has shown profound results in practice. Imago facilitates a deeper connection between partners and fosters a compassionate understanding that transforms their interactions across all areas of life.

What is Imago Relationship Therapy?

            Imago Relationship Therapy (IRT), developed by Harville Hendrix, Ph. D., and Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph. D., offers a transformative approach for couples to enhance their connection and communication. The term "imago," from Latin meaning "image," represents an unconscious blueprint of familiar love formed during early childhood from our interactions with caregivers. This blueprint profoundly influences our romantic relationships later in life.

            Imago Therapy posits that relationship frustrations arise from a deep desire to heal unresolved childhood issues. Everyone carries an "imago," a composite of early caregivers' traits, which shapes our attractions and drives us unconsciously toward partners who resemble these figures in hopes of healing past wounds.

            Imago Relationship Therapy reveals how these early attachments create internal models that influence how we interact with our partners, often replicating childhood dynamics. These conflicts are seen as barriers and opportunities for significant emotional growth. By addressing these foundational experiences and shifting from blame to empathy, Imago Therapy seeks to transform our relationships into sources of strength and resilience.

How Imago Therapy Enhances Communication:

            Central to Imago Therapy is the Imago Dialogue, a structured communication technique that shifts conversations from conflict to connection. This method involves three key steps:

• Mirroring: Consists of listening to your partner and repeating what you hear, without judgment or interpretation, to show that you truly understand their perspective.

• Validating: Acknowledging that your partner’s thoughts and feelings make sense from their viewpoint.

• Empathizing: Attempting to understand and share the feelings of your partner. 

This dialogue framework helps couples move from adversarial interactions to a deeper empathetic connection, fostering safety and vulnerability.

Creating a Safe Conversation Space:

            Imago therapy emphasizes the importance of creating a safe space for conversations. This space allows partners to express their deeper feelings and vulnerabilities without fear of judgment or escalation. This safety is key to defusing the reactivity that can characterize troubled relationships, fostering more intentional and hopeful partner interactions.

A Simple Exercise to Try:

            One impactful and simple exercise from Imago Therapy is the Appreciation Dialogue, where partners take turns sharing something they appreciate about the other. This practice reinforces positive interactions using Mirroring and builds a culture of gratitude and recognition within the relationship:

·      One partner begins by saying, "Something I appreciated about you today is..."
·      The other partner listens, mirrors the statement, " I hear you say you appreciate... about me", and responds, "Did I get that right?"
·      The first partner confirms, and the second partner then offers their appreciation.

Benefits of Imago Therapy:

            Couples who engage in Imago therapy can expect improved communication skills and a profound transformation in their relationship dynamics. This therapy helps couples move from blame and isolation to empathy, acceptance, and mutual appreciation, fostering a secure and passionate relationship.

Closing Words:

            Imago Therapy offers couples a unique lens to view their relationship, providing tools for conflict resolution and deep emotional healing and growth. By embracing this therapeutic approach, couples can transform their relationships into a source of strength and fulfillment, ensuring they survive and thrive together.

References: 
Hendrix, H., & Hunt, H. (2022). Getting the love you want: A guide for couples. Henry Holt & Company.

Book with this author ~Ari Leal, Therapist, CMHCI: https://SouthTampaTherapyBOOKAPPT.as.me/AriLeal

Just Breathe: How to Navigate Stress and Anxiety (Bloom- Tampa TV Interview)

https://www.wfla.com/bloom-tampa-bay/just-breathe-how-to-navigate-stress-and-anxiety/

Ari Leal, MHCI, a South Tampa Therapy team therapist, recently appeared on Gayle Guyardo's wellness show, Bloom, to discuss effective strategies for managing stress and anxiety. Ari Leal, MHCI emphasized the importance of seeking help and shared simple coping techniques. During the segment, Leal also provided clarity on the distinctions between stress and anxiety, as well as their respective triggers.

Book a session with Ari: https://southtampacounselor.com/bookappointment

Navigating the "Roommate Phase" in Relationships: Tips from a Relationship Counselor

As a relationship counselor, I often find myself discussing the challenges couples face as they navigate the different phases of their relationship. One of the most common phases couples experience is what many refer to as the "roommate phase." This phase can feel distant, routine, and lacking in the emotional and physical connection that once felt effortless.

My partner and I have faced our fair share of roommate phases, and through personal experience and professional knowledge, we've developed strategies to reignite our connection. Drawing from the wisdom of renowned relationship experts like John Gottman and the Emotionally Focused Therapy approach, here are some tips that have worked wonders for us:

1. Intentional Quality Time Set aside a specific time each night to put away distractions, especially phones, and focus solely on each other. This intentional quality time fosters open communication and strengthens emotional connection.

2. Prioritize Date Nights Spending time away from the daily grind and kids is crucial. Date nights allow you to reconnect, have fun together, and remember why you fell in love in the first place.

3. Reignite Physical Intimacy Don't underestimate the power of physical affection. Make an effort to kiss and make out like you used to when your relationship was new and exciting.

4. Sync Your Bedtime Going to bed at the same time can create a sense of closeness and intimacy. It's a simple yet effective way to maintain connection and ensure quality time together.

5. Share Household Chores Teamwork makes the dream work! Sharing household chores fosters collaboration and mutual appreciation, strengthening your bond as a couple.

6. Have Meaningful Conversations Sit down and ask the tough questions:

• "Why are we drifting into the roommate phase?"

• "How can we enhance our connection?"

• "What can we do differently to come back together?"

• "Here's what I need from you. What do you need from me?"

7. Embrace the Little Things Small gestures can make a big difference. Whether it's a good morning kiss or a surprise love note, these little acts of kindness and affection go a long way in maintaining connection.

8. Acknowledge the Phase Recognize that the roommate phase is just that – a phase. It's a natural part of many long-term relationships and an opportunity for growth and reconnection.

Gottman's Insights: John Gottman emphasizes the importance of friendship and fondness in relationships. Cultivate a culture of appreciation and admiration for each other. Remember the qualities that you love and appreciate in your partner and express them regularly.

Emotionally Focused Therapy Tips: Emotionally Focused Therapy focuses on creating a secure emotional bond between partners. Validate each other's feelings and emotions, and be open to vulnerability. Create a safe space where both partners feel heard, understood, and valued.

In conclusion, navigating the roommate phase requires effort, communication, and a commitment to your relationship. By incorporating these tips into your daily life and embracing the guidance of relationship experts like Gottman and Emotionally Focused Therapy, you can reignite the spark and strengthen your connection with your partner. Remember, every phase is an opportunity to grow and deepen your love for each other.

By Elizabeth Mahaney, LMHC, MFT, NCC, Ph.D

SOUTH TAMPA THERAPY, WELLNESS, MARRIAGE & FAMILY THERAPY

Book Appointment

Call or Text (813)240-3237

Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Marriage & Family Therapist

❤️ Marriage & Family Therapist 💍 Gottman Relationship Counselor 🧠 Licensed Mental Health Counselor 👂🏽 Non-Violent Communication Facilitator 🌎 National Certified Counselor 👩🏼‍⚕️ Private Practitioner 📈 Entrepreneur, Author & Mentor 🎓Qualified Supervisor for State Licensure ⚖️ FL Supreme Court Family Law Mediator 🥅 Solution Focused ✌🏻Conflict Resolver ❤️ Self Compassion & Self Care Advocate 🧘🏼‍♀️ Mindfulness Meditating Yogi 🤔 Daily Intentions & Reflections 🗣 Neuro Linguistic Programming ✏️ Agile Learning Center Founder 📚 Self Directed Education Alliance 🧑‍🌾 Grower: Fruit Trees & Herbs 🍽 Psychology of Eating & Nutrition 👩‍🏫 Life Long Learner... 📍 Tampa, FL & Jurisdiction to practice in FL, CT, NC, SC, MD, VA

Exploring the Transformative Power of Expressive Arts Therapy: Healing Beyond Words

In the realm of therapy and healing, words are often seen as the primary tool for communication and understanding. However, for many individuals, especially teens and families facing complex emotional challenges, verbalization can be a daunting task. Enter expressive arts therapy, a profound approach that harnesses the power of creative expression to delve into the depths of the human psyche, offering healing and transformation where words may fall short.

Expressive arts therapy is a holistic therapeutic approach that integrates various forms of creative expression, such as visual arts, music, dance, drama, and poetry, into the therapeutic process. It invites individuals to explore their thoughts, feelings, and experiences through non-verbal means, providing a safe and supportive space for self-expression and reflection.

One of the most significant advantages of expressive arts therapy, particularly in the context of working with teens and family therapy, is its ability to bypass the limitations of verbal communication. Adolescence is a time of profound emotional turmoil, as teens navigate the complexities of identity formation, peer relationships, academic pressures, and familial dynamics. Oftentimes, verbalizing these experiences can be challenging, as adolescents may struggle to articulate their thoughts and feelings or fear being judged or misunderstood.

Expressive arts therapy offers an alternative avenue for expression, allowing teens to communicate and process their emotions through creative mediums that resonate with them. Whether it's painting, sculpting, writing, or movement, these artistic outlets provide a means for teens to externalize their inner world, explore their identities, and make sense of their experiences in a non-threatening manner.

Furthermore, expressive arts therapy can be particularly effective in the context of family therapy, where communication breakdowns and unresolved conflicts may hinder progress. Family dynamics are intricate and multifaceted, often involving deeply ingrained patterns of behavior and communication that can be difficult to address through traditional talk therapy alone.

By incorporating expressive arts techniques into family therapy sessions, therapists can encourage family members to express themselves authentically and engage with one another in new and meaningful ways. Collaborative art projects, role-playing exercises, and guided storytelling can help family members explore their relationships, foster empathy and understanding, and work towards resolving conflicts in a creative and constructive manner.

Moreover, expressive arts therapy has been shown to facilitate deeper connections and promote emotional healing within families, as shared creative experiences can foster a sense of solidarity and mutual support. Through the process of creating art together, family members can develop new perspectives, strengthen their bonds, and embark on a journey of healing and growth as a cohesive unit.

In addition to its benefits for teens and families, expressive arts therapy offers a range of advantages for individuals of all ages and backgrounds. It provides a unique opportunity for self-exploration and personal growth, offering a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to connect with their innermost thoughts and emotions. Whether used as a standalone therapy or in conjunction with other therapeutic modalities, expressive arts therapy holds immense potential for fostering healing, resilience, and transformation in the lives of those who engage with it. This unique approach stands as a testament to the profound impact of creative expression on mental health and well-being. By embracing the transformative power of art, individuals, teens, and families can embark on a journey of self-discovery, healing, and growth, transcending the limitations of language to connect with themselves and one another on a deeper level. As we continue to explore innovative approaches to therapy and healing, expressive arts therapy shines as a beacon of hope, offering solace, inspiration, and healing to all who seek it.

By Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I

Book a session with me using the link below:

https://southtampatherapybookappt.as.me/ChelseaR

Harnessing the Mind-Body Connection: Somatic Movement Practices in Therapy for Depression and Anxiety

In the realm of mental health and therapy, the mind-body connection holds immense potential for healing and transformation. Traditional talk therapy approaches often focus on verbal communication and cognitive restructuring to address conditions such as depression and anxiety. However, somatic movement practices, including techniques like shaking and mindfulness, offer a unique pathway to healing by tapping into the profound interplay between the body and the mind.

Depression and anxiety are complex disorders that can manifest not only as psychological symptoms but also as physical sensations of tension, lethargy, and discomfort. Traditional therapeutic approaches often overlook the somatic aspects of these conditions, focusing primarily on addressing cognitive distortions and emotional patterns. However, by incorporating somatic movement practices into therapy sessions, therapists can help clients access deeper layers of healing and resilience.

Somatic movement practices encompass a range of techniques that engage the body in the therapeutic process, facilitating the release of physical tension, emotional blockages, and traumatic memories stored within the body. One such practice is shaking, which involves rhythmic, involuntary movements of the body that promote the discharge of stress and tension. Through shaking, individuals can release pent-up emotions, activate the body's natural relaxation response, and cultivate a greater sense of embodiment and presence.

Mindfulness techniques also play a pivotal role in somatic movement practices, offering individuals a powerful tool for cultivating self-awareness, acceptance, and emotional regulation. Mindfulness involves the intentional focus of attention on present-moment experiences, such as bodily sensations, thoughts, and emotions, without judgment or attachment. By practicing mindfulness, individuals can develop greater resilience to stress, increase their capacity for emotional self-regulation, and cultivate a deeper sense of inner peace and well-being.

In the context of therapy for depression and anxiety, somatic movement practices offer several key benefits:

1.     Regulation of the nervous system: Somatic movement practices, including shaking and mindfulness, have been shown to regulate the autonomic nervous system, promoting a state of relaxation and calmness. By engaging the body in therapeutic interventions, individuals can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which counteracts the stress response and promotes a sense of safety and security.

2.     Release of tension and trauma: Depression and anxiety often involve the accumulation of physical tension and unresolved trauma in the body. Somatic movement practices provide a safe and effective means for releasing these somatic holdings, allowing individuals to discharge stored stress and trauma and restore a sense of balance and vitality.

3.     Integration of mind and body: The mind-body connection lies at the heart of somatic movement practices, emphasizing the interdependence of physical sensations, emotions, and cognitive processes. By integrating the mind and body in therapy, individuals can develop a deeper understanding of the ways in which their thoughts, emotions, and bodily experiences intersect, paving the way for holistic healing and growth.

4.     Empowerment and self-expression: Somatic movement practices empower individuals to reclaim agency over their bodies and emotions, offering a tangible means for expressing and processing their inner experiences. Through movement, individuals can tap into their innate capacity for self-expression, creativity, and resilience, fostering a sense of empowerment and self-efficacy in the face of depression and anxiety.

These movement practices offer a holistic approach to therapy that honors the interconnectedness of the mind and body. By incorporating these techniques clients can access deeper layers of healing, resilience, and self-awareness. As we continue to explore innovative approaches to mental health and well-being, the integration of somatic movement practices stands as a testament to the transformative power of the mind-body connection in facilitating healing, growth, and transformation.

By Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I

Book a session with me using the link below:

https://southtampatherapybookappt.as.me/ChelseaR

Embracing the Full Spectrum: The Power of Increasing Our Window of Tolerance

In the journey of life, we encounter a myriad of emotions, ranging from joy and contentment to sadness and anger. While we often celebrate the positive emotions and strive to cultivate them, the negative ones are frequently met with resistance and avoidance. However, what if I told you that embracing the full spectrum of emotions, including the difficult ones, could lead to greater resilience, freedom, and acceptance?

Our society tends to label negative emotions as something to be avoided or suppressed. We're taught to seek happiness at all costs and to view sadness, anger, or fear as unwelcome intruders in our lives. However, this avoidance can inadvertently lead to a host of harmful behaviors and experiences, as we try to numb or escape from our discomfort rather than confronting it head-on.

The truth is, our bodies are designed to experience a wide range of emotions, both pleasant and unpleasant. Each emotion serves a purpose, offering valuable insights into our inner world and guiding us towards growth and healing. When we suppress or deny our emotions, we disrupt this natural balance, causing tension and disconnection within ourselves.

Increasing our window of tolerance for difficult emotions involves cultivating the capacity to hold and navigate these feelings with compassion and curiosity, rather than judgment or avoidance. It's about acknowledging that pain and discomfort are inevitable parts of the human experience and learning to embrace them as integral aspects of our journey.

But what does it mean to embrace difficult emotions? It's important to understand that acceptance doesn't necessarily mean agreement or approval. Rather, it's about acknowledging the reality of our experiences without trying to change or control them. When we allow ourselves to sit with our discomfort, we create space for healing and transformation to unfold.

Embracing difficult emotions also requires us to cultivate a sense of self-compassion and resilience. Instead of berating ourselves for feeling sad or anxious, we can offer ourselves kindness and understanding, recognizing that our emotions are valid and deserving of acknowledgment. Through this process, we develop greater resilience in the face of adversity, learning to weather life's storms with grace and resilience.

Moreover, embracing difficult emotions can lead to a profound sense of freedom and authenticity. When we no longer fear or suppress our feelings, we become more aligned with our true selves, embracing the fullness of who we are, flaws and all. This authenticity allows us to live more fully and authentically, connecting with others on a deeper level and experiencing life with greater richness and depth. By embracing the full spectrum of our emotional experience, we open ourselves up to a life of greater resilience and freedom. Rather than viewing pain and discomfort as enemies to be avoided, let us embrace them as valuable teachers on the journey toward wholeness and self-discovery. As we learn to tolerate and embrace all that life has to offer, we unlock the door to true healing and transformation.

By Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I

Book a session with me using the link below:

https://southtampatherapybookappt.as.me/ChelseaR

Understanding Emotion Dismissing in Relationships: Effects on Partners & Strategies for Healing

If you've ever found yourself feeling shut off by your partner, it can be extremely hurtful. Sharing our innermost thoughts and emotions with our partner is a vulnerable yet meaningful act. However, when met with indifference, invalidation, or dismissal from our partner, this vulnerability can lead to deep wounds and a sense of emotional disconnection. In this blog post, we'll delve into the impact of emotion dismissing in relationships and explore strategies for nurturing a more empathetic and validating connection with our partners.

What is Emotion Dismissing? 

Emotion dismissing refers to the act of downplaying or disregarding the feelings and emotions expressed by one's partner. It can manifest in various forms, including outright denial of the validity of the emotions, belittling the significance of the feelings, or ignoring them altogether. This behavior can occur consciously or unconsciously and often stems from a lack of emotional awareness, communication skills, or empathy.

Impact on Relationships

For the partner experiencing emotion dismissing, the effects can be deeply distressing and invalidating. They may feel unheard, misunderstood, and unimportant in the relationship. Each instance of dismissal can chip away at their sense of self-worth, leaving them questioning the validity of their emotions and their place within the partnership. Over time, these repeated dismissals can erode their self-esteem and confidence in expressing their feelings authentically. This erosion of trust and emotional safety can lead to a gradual withdrawal, as they begin to protect themselves from further hurt by withholding their emotions or withdrawing from emotional intimacy altogether. Additionally, unresolved emotions may accumulate, resulting in heightened conflict and distance in the relationship, as the unresolved tensions simmer beneath the surface, waiting to erupt.

Conversely, for the partner engaging in emotion dismissing, their behavior may stem from a sense of overwhelm and a need to protect themselves from the discomfort of the feelings being shared. However, in their attempt to shield themselves from discomfort, they inadvertently inflict harm on their partner. They also may struggle to find validity in their partner's perspective, perceiving it as utterly ridiculous. Their dismissive responses create a pattern of invalidation and conflict, further eroding the emotional connection and trust within the relationship. Over time, this cycle can lead to feelings of guilt, disconnection, and relational distress for both partners, as they find themselves caught in a downward spiral of misunderstanding and hurt.

Strategies for Healing and Navigating Emotion Dismissing

Emotion dismissing often stems from our own discomfort with emotions, feelings of overwhelm, or a lack of confidence in handling our partner's feelings. Learning to validate our partner is a crucial skill in nurturing connection and trust. By acknowledging and holding space for our partner's emotions, regardless of our agreement, we create a profound sense of understanding and support. Cultivating this emotional awareness enables us to deepen our understanding of our own and our partner's emotions. Building a culture of emotional safety in our relationship, where both partners feel safe expressing themselves, is essential for maintaining closeness and connection. This may involve preparing ourselves to respond to challenging feelings with empathy and understanding. Developing confidence in our ability to manage difficult emotions is key to navigating these challenges together. It is also important to note that emotion dismissing can result from misinterpretations of our partner's expressions, leading us to feel attacked. Ultimately, it is through building a foundation of mutual respect that a safe space for honest expression can be created. 

Seeking guidance from a therapist can help clarify these underlying reasons and provide support for making different choices in how we engage with our partner's emotions. If you're ready to explore these concepts further and embark on your journey towards healthier relational dynamics, you can reach out today and sign up for therapy using my link below.

Written by Chelsea Reeves, MFT-I 

Book a session with me using the link below:

https://southtampatherapybookappt.as.me/ChelseaR